On Fugu

It was at lunch in a restaurant that shall remain nameless that I first tasted Rape Beef. The eatery in question was a -----/--------/---- brassiere specializing in said bovine delicacy. It is said that RB combines all the elements of our most popular meat based treats while at once addressing the desire in present in most modern men to transgress vicariously; it allows the diner to participate in a positive orgy of blood lust and depravity during lunch and without his needing to change shoes.
On request a diner could obtain a biography, of some poor beast; complete with a written description of its final days, or for a significant surcharge a video of highlights from the killing floor. It is not difficult to deduce the target demographic for this cuisine. What did prove surprising was the popularity of RB among the legions of progressively minded ethical consumers.

Inevitably things could at times become slightly over heated: usually at the weekends and during the evening service, this was mostly down to an excess of alcohol, but on occasion the meat or more accurately the meat menu was to blame; there were several instances of wealthy patrons being asked to leave after they were found to be excessively aroused by the whole experience. There was no malice in these expulsions and the disruptive patrons were inevitably re-admitted to conclude their meal once they had relieved themselves at a nearby facility, as such a degree of symbiosis existed between the two establishments it was decided that they should merge. This decision was taken exclusively by the management and initially met with serious resistance from both sets of workers. I am told that the ethical custom dropped off around this time. And though at the time this was of little concern in the burgeoning economic climate it can now be seen as a definite turning point. In time cross-pollination twixt the brothel and bistro (sorry) had led to the most controversial/progressive/illegal service: namely rape rape. As you can no doubt see; by the time I came to eat there the initial premise of my story had collapsed under the weight of inevitability that is I suppose a human inevitability. I don’t know when it went wrong was it when the men from the sex trade got involved? Was it when the ethical eaters left? Or was it all fucked the moment it started? Rape beef indeed!